Curse of the Crimson Throne

Well That Was Unexpected

In which the job gets done

I don’t know why everyone’s so shocked the job’s done. This lot. I tell ya, they couldn’ keep track of themselves on the wrong side o’ town. Honestly, I’m a bit surprised they’ve lasted as long as they have, considerin’. Still, most of ‘em ain’t so bad. JP‘s kind of soggy and Toadie’s a bit of a thicky, but they’re a right lot better’n Gaedren ever was. Arsebiscuit.

So yeah, we came up with a grand old plan to get the wheezy old geezer out of the meat shack and distract ‘im with Faustin. How that worked out is anybody’s guess but seems I’m outta curtains now. Bet I can con the innkeep into puttin’ it on Miss Prissypants’ tab. I sure as shingles won’t be payin’ that bill. Anyway, I climb up the ladder and crawl over to the window and whosit is asleep. ASLEEP. Now you tell me if those ain’t the ripest pickin’s you ever heard of. So I go inside and make sure the bloke is nice and unconscious right? Easy as pie.

But then I start to get bored ‘cause nobody’s about and Kieran’s always been the brains in these operations. What’s so important in this gent’s office? So I poke about and find some things what I think might fetch some useful information and wait. And wait. And wait. And finally that fancy elf comes up the ladder looking all confused about her face and I’m tryin’ to get her to come over and she’s looking at me like I’m speakin’ another language and eventually she starts to seein’ the light and creeps over (not as good as me, but then she’s not me). I pop up with the chap—who is heavy!—and eventually everyone’s got the good sense to get a wagon and next thing you know it’s ZIP! Down the alley and no ma’am we can certainly wait until morning to get paid. Honestly. Cross heart they waited.

But we celebrated, too. Well, much as we could. Turns out JP and elfy can’t hold their liquor much as they like and Faustin had too much of a good time seems like. Kept trying to tell Toadie what the job was, but his brain thinks too hard about it and couldn’t keep up. Walls is easy once you know how to be less. Oh well. We keep it up I might be outta this hole yet.

Comments

OH MY GOD THIS IS WRITTEN IN THE SAME VOICE AS THE GODDAMN KID AND I STILL DON’T KNOW EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED.

Well That Was Unexpected
 

That said, well done. =_=

Well That Was Unexpected
 

The best part of this entire post are Zach’s tags. I can practically see Toadie flailing in confused frustration.

Well That Was Unexpected
hungryjoe42 Elenol

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